Talking foster care and adoption with Iowa KidsNet

Resolutions that can last a lifetime

2012-01-05T09:22:00.000-06:00

As many of us start on New Year's resolutions (or break them!), a Latino community blogger and Iowa KidsNet staff in Des Moines has a suggestion for Latino families out there: Consider a resolution that can last a lifetime, and explore foster care and adoption.

While Latinos are about ten percent of our capital city's population, they represent over 15% of the kids placed in foster care. These kids tend to be predominantly Spanish-speaking and from multigenerational households.

Having a foster family who shares a child's culture can be an important asset for children who have been removed from their homes and can reduce some of their shock, trauma and confusion. And when there is no such foster home available, foster parents of any ethnic background can - and often do - help keep a cultural link between a child and his or her heritage.

Here's an excerpt from Christina's post. You can read the full blog at the link below.

["Imagine this: The date is December 24th of any given year and you are a four-year old Mexican-American boy who has not yet learned English. You have just been placed in a foster home where no one speaks your language and cannot comfort you, reassure you that you will be safe, tell you what to expect, or when you will see your parents again. You cannot tell them that milk and cheese make your tummy hurt, or that you can’t sleep without your stuffed frog that you fear is lost forever. Everyone smiles at you and speaks loudly and slowly in a language you are only vaguely familiar with. They offer you a plate roasted turkey, mashed potatoes and green bean casserole. You see the Christmas tree in the corner and wonder when the tamales and champurrado will be served. You feel terrified, confused, abandoned, sad and helpless...."]

Read more of Christina's thoughts here.

You'd be surprised how much you, your family, your church, your business or your community organization can offer to make a difference for youth in foster care. If you're interested in learning more, go here.

Thanks, and Happy New Year!

Angels in Adoption

2011-11-17T15:18:00.001-06:00

We're privileged this week to share a story from one of Iowa's 2011 Angels in Adoption nominees, the McIntyre family!

Angels in Adoption is a terrific program from the Congressional Coalition for Adoption Institute, which allows members of Congress to honor selfless individuals, organizations and families who have made extraordinary contributions for children who needing loving homes.

Past recipients include some pretty good company, such as Sean and Leigh Anne Tuohy, First Lady Laura Bush, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Kristin Chenoweth, Rhea Perlman, Bruce Willis, Al Roker, Muhammad Ali, Patti LaBelle, Jane Seymour, Henry Winkler and CBS Studios.

Learn more about one of our Iowa nominees and their unique experience celebrating adoption on Capitol Hill!

Making a difference as the McIntyre family

DeeMcIntyre first learned about foster care as a nurse in southwest Iowa. She wason her evening shift one night when a six-year-old boy was waiting in theemergency room for his relatives to arrive.

Dee’sheart went out to him, and she immediately wondered if she could take him hometo their family for the night until his family arrived. When she was told thatshe would need to be a licensed foster family to care for him, it sparked herawareness of the ongoing need for foster and adoptive homes in her area.

In 2002,Dee and her husband Ken received their foster care license. Fast forward nineyears, and they have now adopted four children from foster care – Aubrey, 11;Dillon, 10; Sam, 9; and Abby, 8.

InOctober, Dee, Dillon and Sam traveled to Washington, D.C., as one of Iowa’s “Angelsin Adoption” nominees, nominated by Rep. Steve King (R-IA).

Thefamily participated in a breakfast and resource fair, a bus tour of the Capitoland other historic sites, an evening gala and many other events. A highlight,Dee said, was meeting former foster youth who were now interning at theCongressional Coalition on Adoption Institute.

“Theentire trip was so uplifting,” Dee said. “I just want to share it with everyone.You hear a lot of difficult stories sometimes, and it was so incredible to seeformer foster youth who had made it and were having success as young adults.”

They've got our votes! Sam and Dillon pause in front of the White House.

Heryoung sons, Dillon and Sam, were proud to be in attendance, she said.

“Everywherewe went they were excited to tell people they were in Washington, D.C. for an‘adoption award,’ whether it was the bus driver or a doorman,” Dee said with alaugh.

Theirjourney didn’t end there. For November’s National Adoption Month, Dee, Dillonand Sam shared their Angels in Adoption adventures with a foster and adoptiveparent support group in Southwest Iowa.

And that’s only one example of how many otherfamilies across Iowa are spreading the word this November, all sharing theirhearts and voices to make a difference.

Thanks to the McIntyres for sharing their experiences with us, and congratulations to all the families who will be adopting at Iowa's six National Adoption Day events this weekend!

Happy National Adoption Month!

2011-11-01T16:01:00.000-05:00

Happy National Adoption Month!

It's an exciting time to celebrate adoption and also to raise awareness for the more than 107,000 children across the nation who are still waiting to be adopted from foster care into forever families.

We've been hearing a lot of great adoption stories already leading up to November.

Like the couple in their mid-twenties who adopted a pre-teen and will be adopting another child this month.

Or, the mother who became a foster and adoptive parent simply because she heard an ad on her local radio station that kids needed homes.

Like the single mother adopting a 15-year-old girl, giving her a place to call home as she moves into her young adult years.

Or, like the family with five adopted children, who believes there is always more room at the table.

There are literally thousands of stories of people building positive, permanent connections for kids, and we're lucky to hear even a few of them every day.

If you've ever considered becoming a foster or adoptive parent or wondered how you could help, National Adoption Month is a great time to get involved!

Find a local candlelight vigil on our website, or download some of our resources to use in your community. Or, meet children waiting to be adopted right here in Iowa.

Thanks to all those making a difference in the lives of children in foster care!

P.S. Make sure you like us on Facebook, so you can keep up with news about National Adoption Month, including some fun giveaways starting on Monday, November 7!

"Unadoptable is unacceptable"

2011-10-28T08:59:00.002-05:00

Happy Friday!

The Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption recently released the findings of a five-year evaluation on the success of their Wendy's Wonderful Kids program, which helps find homes for children waiting to be adopted from foster care. Check out their powerful video below for some Friday morning inspiration!

Bringing waiting children into the light

2011-10-25T08:58:00.000-05:00

As we celebrate November's National Adoption Month, the Heart Gallery of Iowa will be traveling around the state to raise awareness for children waiting to be adopted from foster care.

While the ultimate goal of foster care is to reunify children with their birth families, sometimes children cannot return home and they may need a new permanent home through adoption. The Heart Gallery is one way to help raise awareness of these waiting children.

Ever wondered what the Heart Gallery is or how it started? Jerusha, our Heart Gallery of Iowa coordinator, shares its great story below and ways to learn more! Thanks Jerusha!

The National Heart Gallery in Washington, D.C.

The Heart Gallery gets its start

What do you see when you look into the eyes of a child?Innocence, perhaps? Wonder? Pure joy?

A poignant photograph of a child canreveal these same qualities and emotions—and may elicit emotion from those whoview it.

It was this very concept that led to the creation of a unique way tohelp children in foster care find adoptive families: the Heart Gallery.

The very first Heart Gallery wasformed by the New Mexico Children, Youth and Families Department in 2001 as away to raise awareness about adoption and find homes for older children andsibling groups in foster care.

Photographer and adoptive mother Cathy MaierCallanan suggested that stirring, professional portraits would be a fresh wayto show people the unique personalities of children waiting to be adopted.

Thisidea was implemented and named by Department recruiter Diane Granito, whoobtained donations from businesses andorganizations in her community.

Over 1,200 people attended the grand opening ofthe first annual “Heart Gallery” exhibit at the prestigious Gerald PetersGallery in Santa Fe, New Mexico on March 9, 2001.

This event drew mediaattention and resulted in the adoption of many of the featured children. Nowthis exhibit of about 50 current portraits travels throughout New Mexico eachyear to raise awareness and interest in the children legally available foradoption in that state.

A decade later, there are now Heart Galleries in 45 states,including Iowa. These exhibits create public awareness of thechildren in each state waiting to be adopted and also hopefully touch families and inspire them to adopt a child.

The talent and generosity of photographers

These compelling images not only reveal the spirit of thechild, but also reflect the compassion, generosity and talent of each of thephotographers behind the lens.

Iowaphotographer Mark Oehler, after photographing a child for the Heart Gallery ofIowa, said “It was my privilege. It is a small way for me to give back.”

Theseskilled photographers, volunteering their time at no cost to the agencies,capture the individuality of each child and have helped hundreds of childrenfind permanent, loving families.

"I am completely honored to have the opportunity to help a child who is going through a similar situation that I have already [experienced.] I became a photographer to help people and I am so grateful for the opportunity to help." - Alaina Ellington, Iowa photographer.

The Heart Gallery of Iowa

Here in Iowa, Iowa KidsNet created the HeartGallery of Iowa to spotlight our own waiting children.

November is NationalAdoption Month, and the Heart Gallery of Iowa will be displayed across thestate throughout the month. You can view portraits of waiting Iowa children atan event near you!

Visit our eventspage to see where the Heart Gallery of Iowa will bedisplayed next.

The National Heart Gallery in Washington, D.C.

In 2005, thanks to the diligent efforts of adoptionadvocates across the country, a National Heart Gallery was established inWashington, D.C.

This year, to celebratethe 10^th anniversary of the formation of the first Heart Gallery,and in honor of National Adoption Month, a NationalHeart Gallery Exhibit willbe displayed on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C.

The National HeartGallery Exhibit will feature beautiful photos of children across the nationhoping to find their "forever families." Find out more at www.nationalheartgalleryexhibit.org.

Also, click on the Gallery page to view photos and short descriptions offeatured children from each of the Heart Galleries across the country,including Allen, a waiting Iowa child!

National organizations have noticed the effectiveness ofthis unique recruitment tool. The US Children's Bureau named the “HeartGallery” as a best practice in the field of adoption, and The SmithsonianPhotography Initiative included Photography changes the ways families are formed, a great storyabout Heart Gallery photography written by Diane Granito, in their web feature Click! Photography Changes Everything.

Thanks to one photographer with a creative idea and oneworker with a big heart—and hundreds of compassionate parents, advocates, andvolunteers after them—the Heart Gallery has helped untold numbers of children infoster care who are waiting for adoptive families step from the shadows intothe light.

Reflecting on respite care: A mom's first respite adventure

2011-09-06T13:06:00.000-05:00

If you've considered becoming a foster parent but were hesitant about stepping into a full-time commitment, providing respite care can be a great way to get started. Respite care involves providing temporary, short-term care for children in foster care to give their foster parents a brief break.

While you still go through the same training and licensing process and while we still encourage you to consider fostering children during longer-term placements in the future, respite care can be a good first step. Here's what one Iowa foster and adoptive mom had to share about her first time providing respite care:

Reflecting on Respite

My husband and I were licensed last year and chose to provide respite care because we wanted to help children and foster families and thought it would be an excellent way to get to know a variety of children along the way. Our first experience was a rewarding and challenging experience, and we can’t wait to do it again.

It all started with a phone call one afternoon from a foster mother caring for a set of seven-year old twins. “Perfect," I thought, since I have a seven-year old daughter who loves play dates. The care would be for five days, and they’d come meet our family the evening before I was to pick them up from daycare to begin their stay with us.

Shy at first, my daughter and the twins sized each other up a bit. I noticed their ease and her excitement grow as I encouraged them to play on the porch swing.

As they swung, I learned more about them from their foster mom. That is one of the greatest parts of providing respite. You get to hear all about their habits, history and personality, which is not always available immediately upon placement. I was given tips for how to get them to eat, sleep and mind their manners.

The children switched to playing in my daughter’s dollhouse while I got a run down of their medications, directions to their daycare and reassurance that they would be on their best behavior. For me, being used to one fairly quiet child in my home, that is the golden ticket about providing respite. The children, for the most part, behave superbly because they want you to like them. You offer them a fresh start, void of the labels others in their lives may have put on them and the pressure they have to live up to them. It’s what’s known as the ‘honeymoon phase’, which resembles a courtship where all parties put their best foot forward trying to impress one another. I felt completely confident that everything would be fine and that my daughter would love having some company.

I was right. The kids were sweet, courteous, obedient and not much more work than I was used to. Sure, like all kids their age, there was energy to be expended and I found myself wanting to make sure to spend quality time with each of them, which was a change of pace for me, but it was also joyful to hear giggles at bedtime and get extra morning hugs.

Respite is also beneficial to the foster parents who provide the ongoing care for the children. Raising children isn’t easy and when you add in some of the extra complexities of temporarily raising another person’s child, a child who may have some special needs or behavior issues, it can be draining. Respite allows the foster family a break.

For blended families, it allows the birth or adopted kids in the home a chance to spend alone time with their parents, who inevitably spend a lot of their time focused on the child they are fostering. It gives them a chance to recharge so they can continue to advocate for, encourage and guide the children who are in foster care.

An added benefit I noticed is that it gives the kids and their foster families an opportunity to miss one another. I saw that as the twins ran to greet their foster parents and tell them all about their time with my family. The foster parents beamed listening to the excitement in the twins' voices, and I could tell they were happy to be reunited and continue their journey together.

I always recommend that people try respite. It’s a great way to ease into foster parenting and there is always a need for it. If you’re thinking about becoming a foster parent but aren’t sure, go for respite and try it on for size. If you’re a licensed family and have room in your home, let your support worker know you’re willing to provide respite. I’m sure countless children and their foster parents will be grateful you did.

Talking foster care with IPR

2011-08-31T15:52:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone!

We wanted to update you on a great radio show that will be taking place next week. Iowa Public Radio's "Talk of Iowa" weekday segment will be talking foster care and adoption on Tuesday, Sept. 6 from 10 - 11 a.m.

If you're an Iowa foster or adoptive parent or a former alumni of the foster care system, we'd especially encourage you to tune in. "Talk of Iowa" is a live, call-in show, so there will be an opportunity to join the conversation and share about your experiences.

You can find your local IPR station on their website at www.iowapublicradio.org.

Thanks!

Coffee Break with Julie

2011-08-01T09:00:00.000-05:00

Today we're excited to spend a few minutes with Julie, one of our post-adoption support specialists. Julie has a wide range of experiences not only as a support specialist, but as a foster and adoptive mother herself! She helps provide support and resources to meet the unique needs of adoptive families.

Hi Julie! Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

I live in Radcliffe, north of Ames. My husband and I have four children, three of which were adopted from foster care. Our kids are involved in many activities that keep us busy. We took the first PS-MAPP class in Iowa and were licensed foster parents for six years.

You have lots of experience to share with your adoptive parents. What do you enjoy about supporting families?

I enjoy connecting families to resources.

What's one resource you wish all adoptive families knew about?

Each family has different needs so that is difficult to answer. I wish all families who adopted from foster care in past years knew about post adoption services.

What's a commonly asked question you receive from families and how do you respond?

When children have their parental rights terminated or are having a termination of parental rights (TPR) hearing soon, many foster families have questions about the adoption process, adoption subsidy and Title 19. I explain the timeline from the TPR hearing to adoption. I also explain the criteria for adoption subsidy, future needs and Title 19, and the documentation needed.

As we approach the start of the school year, do you have any tips for helping parents transition children back into a school routine?

Start getting into a routine a few weeks before school begins. Start using "school" bedtimes and getting up in the morning at the time they will need to get up for school. Have them go through their normal routine that they will have each morning before heading off to school. Make sure kids are getting plenty of sleep. It seems the first couple of weeks of school tire them out!

Do you have a favorite moment from your work or personal experience in the foster care and adoption field?

Adoption Saturdays every November in Webster City! There is a lot of excitement and emotion on that day.

Everyone deserves a graduation party

2011-06-27T10:33:00.001-05:00

Every once in awhile you hear a story that totally fills your soul. Here's a story we loved recently about one Iowa church making a difference for youth in foster care.

When this church heard about how many teens age out of foster care each year, often without the support or resources of a caring adult, they decided to do something. In a few weeks, they rallied their entire community - friends, neighbors, businesses, social workers - to pull together an incredible graduation party for area youth in foster care.

“Most people didn’t know that this need existed or even knew about foster care, but once they knew, most had a heartfelt connection,” one church member said. “They had a child or grandchild who was graduating, and they couldn’t imagine their own child not having the support system we take for granted.”

From laptop computers to cookie sheets to personal finance education, each graduate received many gifts that would spur their success in college or in living on their own for the first time.

You can read the full story here at LSI's website, one of our partner agencies.

Thanks to First Lutheran Church in Decorah for sharing love and encouragement with these youth!

Francesca's Foster Care Story

2011-05-11T15:13:00.000-05:00

Thanks to some inspiring youth at Elevate, Iowa's advocacy organization for youth in foster care, we're privileged to share insights from those who know our foster care system the best - our young people.

Here what Francesa, an alumni of Iowa's foster care system, has to say about her experiences and why parents shouldn't be afraid to foster teenagers.

Were you inspired or surprised by anything she had to share? If you've ever considered fostering teens, check out our list of Top 10 Reasons to Foster Teenagers.

Thanks!

Why foster parents matter

2011-05-10T13:48:00.000-05:00

Last month at a youth conference in Ames, several youth and community members stopped by our booth to offer their thoughts on why foster parents, and support for youth in foster care, are important. Here's what they had to share!

"Changing my part of the world"

2011-05-06T15:18:00.000-05:00

The best way to learn about foster care is to hear from the folks directly involved. Thanks to our awesome spring intern Hanna, we have a series of video interviews to share with you during May's National Foster Care Month, starting today with an area family who fosters teenage girls.

Look for more videos this month that will share thoughts from teens currently or formerly in foster care, thanks to the youth advocacy group Elevate!

Thanks to Deb below for sharing her insights, and to all of Iowa's wonderful foster families.

You make an incredible difference.

Check out our events page for more info on what's happening during May's National Foster Care Month! Here's a couple items coming up. If you're in the area, we'd love to have you there:

Saturday, May 7 - Get Lifted! in Cedar Rapids

Monday, May 9 - Governor proclamation signing at Iowa State Capitol in Des Moines

Have a great weekend!

What would be your reason for doing foster care?

2011-04-25T16:29:00.000-05:00

Brandy's "I Did It" reason

National Foster Care Month starts next week! We've got lots of stuff planned, including a May 9 proclamation signing with Iowa's Governor, and we're also looking forward to sharing with you video interviews with Iowa resource families and teens during May. Here's some more events and resources if you're interested.

A few weeks ago we put out a call to Iowa's foster families to share with us their "I Did It" reasons - or in other words, the reason why they chose to step into the important role of resource family. We'll be sharing these again during May in hopes that other Iowans would also consider becoming a foster or adoptive family.

Here's a few of the ones we heard from Iowa families:

"We did it because we can!"
"Because every person is a child of God."
We did it because we couldn't have kids of our own but can't wait to parent!"
"I did it because I enjoy kids and hope I can make a difference in someone's life."
"Because the need is there, and it's very important to us."
"Because we want to share our love."
"Because we believe every child deserves to be in a safe, nurturing environment."
"I just want to give back to tomorrow's leaders."

If you're a foster parent, why did you choose to become one? Or, why do you feel it's important to support youth in foster care? We'd love to hear.

Coffee break with Becky

2011-04-13T16:16:00.001-05:00

Today it's time to meet another support and licensing specialist - Becky from our Western side of the state! Becky graciously shared a few insights about what she loves about working in the child welfare field, as well as some things you might consider if you're interested in making an impact as a resource family.

Photo via Flickr - Phil Monger

Hi Becky! Can you tell us a little about yourself and your role with Iowa families?

I've worked in many areas in the social service field, including waiver homes, after school programs, in-home services, a domestic violence shelter, and my favorite - working with children in foster care and foster parents. I am a foster and adoptive home licensing and support specialist, covering families in about nine counties in Western Iowa.

I aid families in renewing their license, help them find training opportunities, support them through difficult situation with a placement or personal matter and am their sounding board for questions and concerns.

What do you enjoy about this role?

I enjoy seeing children in foster homes succeed in all aspects of their life. I love to see the difference that foster homes give children through consistency and making children feel a part of their immediate family, as well as the connections foster families have with biological families and their willingness to maintain that connection and bond.

The joy on a foster parent's face when they have assisted in successfully reuniting children with their biological families is priceless. I also enjoy hearing foster parents talk about the progress children in their home have made and the positive feeling this gives the foster families who work so hard.

As a support specialist, what's one essential tip or resource you often recommend to families?

One essential tip is to use the resources surrounding you, whether this includes therapy services, in-home services, support groups, other foster families or respite care. I like to point out to foster families that everyone deserves a break and using respite gives themselves as well as the children they care for a break.

Name three qualities that help a foster family be successful.

Patience, consistency and being willing to try new techniques and skills in parenting.

Can you share a favorite story from your years in the field?

I've seen many families grow through adoption, long term foster care or just by being a support to biological families even after reunification. Many parents meet lifelong friends and maintain relationships with past placements throughout their adult life.

Any words of advice for those considering becoming foster parents?

Foster parenting is very rewarding. There are a lot of support systems available, and it's essential you use all those resources. It's important to understand your own family dynamics and make decisions that your entire family can handle and fit your strengths.

Thanks Becky! Iowa is lucky to have a strong support network for foster and adoptive families. What kind of support is most helpful in your life, whether as a foster/adoptive parent or just in dealing with everyday ups and downs?

Good books for May (or any day!)

2011-04-06T10:31:00.001-05:00

As we gear up for May's National Foster Care Month, several of our resource family recruiters are encouraging local libraries to display books about foster care or adoption from foster care during May. (See some good resources for libraries here.)

If you are a bookworm, this would be a great way to get involved in Foster Care Month awareness efforts in your local community! We'd suggest getting in touch with the resource family recruiter near you to see if they're already planning something at your local library. If not, they would probably love your help!

You could also suggest your library do a story time with a foster care related book, highlight movies with foster care related themes or even display books or movies about famous former foster youth.

A new book you could suggest to your local library is Michael Oher's new memoir: I Beat The Odds: From Homelessness to The Blind Side and Beyond. The real life inspiration behind the film The Blind Side, Oher wrote the book partly in response to thousands of letters he received from youth in foster care.

Here's a clip of Oher sharing a little about why he wrote it:

We'd love to hear what books or films you'd suggest on the subject of foster care or adoption? Any favorites? You can see others' thoughts over on our Facebook page.

Spring forward with post-adoption support

2011-04-04T13:39:00.004-05:00

As spring approaches, it’s a great time to pause and take a fresh look at all the resources available to your family. We'd like to remind all subsidized adoptive families to consider taking advantage of free post-adoption support.

Here's the highlights:

All Iowa families with a DHS-subsidized adoption are eligible for free support through Iowa KidsNet's Navigator program. Your family is eligible for post-adoption support services for children age 18 and under, no matter how long a child has been a part of your family.

If you have adopted through DHS and receive Title 19 insurance as part of the adoption agreement or have a future needs statement as part of the adoption agreement, you are also eligible.

The goal of post-adoption support is to keep both your child and family stable by developing a support plan that meets the unique needs and circumstances of your family. For example, your support specialist can:

Visit your family at your home
Provide behavior management plans and assistance
Respond to crisis calls from your family
Assist and support your family’s relationship with a birth family or kin
Advocate with schools, DHS and service providers for a child’s treatment or needs
Coordinate with licensing workers or providers connected to your family
Connect you to community resources
Connect you to a local adoption support group

Post-adoption support is flexible! Even if you don’t feel as though your family currently needs additional support, you may want to meet your support specialist and learn more. Then, if you ever do need more support, you already have the resources in place.

Want to know more? Please give us a call at 1.800.243.0756.

Are you a foster or adoptive family? What kind of support resources have been most helpful to you?

Fist Pump Friday

2011-04-01T13:00:00.001-05:00

Happy Friday!

As we close out the week, here's a few things that got us talking this week. They definitely deserve a fist pump!

Community graduation party for teens. Will you be attending a graduation open house this spring for friends or family? What if there was a whole group of students who graduated and never had a party or acknowledgment of their achievement? A group of folks in Cedar Valley is making sure all foster youth in their area get to celebrate! You're invited to come encourage youth earning their diplomas and G.E.Ds. See more.

Great foster parent stories. To be a successful foster parent, you need patience, flexibility and a willingness to be part of a team (among other things!). I heard a powerful story this week about all three, as a family who initially became licensed intending to adopt later changed their perceptions about how how their family could help others. They've since become involved in foster parenting and helping birth families. In a twist, they may end up adopting after all, as one of their youth may need an adoptive home. It's great to see families discover new strengths.

Waiting child stories. It is always a good moment when we receive a request to remove a child from the Iowa KidsNet photolistings. This means potential adoptive homes or a permanent connection to a supportive, caring adult has been identified. Meet other Iowa children still waiting for this permanent support.

Iowa Aftercare Services Network. In all 99 counties, Iowa youth aging out of foster care can connect with the Iowa Aftercare Services Network to be assigned a self-sufficiency advocate and learn more about available support as they transition to young adulthood. See this week's news story highlighting this important resource!

What in your life deserves a fist pump this week?

Why Social Workers Matter

2011-03-25T15:23:00.000-05:00

Let's end this Friday on a positive note! March is National Social Work Month, a time to raise public awareness about social work and to thank those engaged in this important role.

Folks at the National Association of Social Workers asked social workers around the country one very important question - why are social workers important to our nation's future?

You can see what they had to say in the video below. One of my favorite responses: "People like my mommy help make it all better."

Thanks to Iowa's social workers who make a difference!

Hugs Help Kids in Foster Care

2011-02-10T15:21:00.000-06:00

Starting Valentine's Day weekend, we'll be piloting a new campaign in western Iowa, called Hugs Help Kids in Foster Care.

2011 Campaign logo

Inspired by this story here, one of our recruiters came up with the idea to connect with the community on the issue of foster care in a new way. Last year in Woodbury County there were approximately 700 out-of-home placements of youth. In Council Bluffs, in Pottawattamie County, there were nearly 600 out-of-home placements.

The goal of Hugs Help Kids in Foster Care is to raise more community awareness for these counties. We'll be out at seven locations from Feb. 12 - Feb. 26, hoping to gather 700 Sioux City "hugs" and 600 Council Bluffs "hugs" from community members to show their support for Iowa youth in foster care. We'll ask you to sign your name as a symbolic "hug" of support, and you'll get a free chocolate "hug" in return.

Hugs are about connection. Every young person deserves to be connected to a supportive and caring adult in his or her life, and youth thrive when they have this support. Our hope is that more adults will consider how they can offer that support and guidance, perhaps as a foster or adoptive parent or in other ways, to young people in their community.

Here's where we'll be if you want to stop by in February! See you then!

Council Bluffs locations:

Feb. 12, 11 a.m. - 1:30 p.m., Mall of the Bluffs food court, 1751 Madison Ave
Feb. 19, 11 a.m. – 1:30 p.m., K-Mart pharmacy, 2803 E. Kanesville Blvd
Feb. 26, 11 a.m. – 1:30 p.m., Shopko, 3271 Market Place Drive

Sioux City locations:

Feb. 12, 10 a.m. – 4 p.m., Hy-Vee on 3301 Gordon Drive
Feb. 17, 10 a.m. – 4 p.m., Hy-Vee on Singing Hills Blvd
Feb. 19, 10 a.m. – 4 p.m., Hy-Vee on 2827 Hamilton Blvd
Feb. 23, 10 a.m. – 2 p.m. at the Wilbur Aalfs Library (Gleeson Room), 529 Pierce St.

Thanks, and an early Happy Valentine's Day to you!

Celebrating service

2011-01-13T16:00:00.001-06:00

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. once said, "Life's most persistent and urgent question is: 'What are you doing for others?"

Monday is the 25th anniversary of Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and it's also a day when we come together to try and answer that question through service in our neighborhoods, our communities and our cities.

There are a lot of great ways to give back across the country, and if you have some time to lend a hand, here's a great place to get started.

I think about that question, and I think about the ways our foster and adoptive parents have answered it. We asked a simple question last year when we launched our "I Did It" campaign. The question we posed to families was "Why did you become a foster parent?" Here's what they wrote back.

"I did it because I saw a huge need in our community, and I wanted to be part of the solution."

"I did it because these children are our future and if we can make a difference in even one child's life then maybe we can make the future better."

"I did it to help families keep their family together."

"I did it because I wanted to keep siblings together."

"I did it because there is always room for one more person at your table."

"I did it because their birth mother asked for help."

"I did it to help give a child a good, solid start toward adulthood. So many children don't get that."

"We did it because it is not their fault that sometimes there are bump in the road."

"I did it because I am thankful for what our family has."

The list goes on and on. There are a lot of different reasons, but they all capture the spirit of Dr. King's question—What are you doing for others?

Thanks to all of our foster parents, adoptive parents and community partners who work with youth for choosing to answer that question in such a profound and life-changing way.

Do you have a MLK Day of Service project happening near you? Let us know how it goes!

5 New Year's resolutions to consider

2011-01-06T13:25:00.001-06:00

Maybe you've already made some New Year's resolutions this year (or broken a few!). Either way, we have a few simple suggestions to add to your list. :)

1. Encourage one person this year to consider foster care. Is there a family in your neighborhood or church who you have always thought would make great foster parents? Tell them! Share how great you think they are with kids, and ask them if they've ever considered it. Many people have become foster or adoptive parents simply because someone asked them. And regardless of whether they end up pursuing more information, that kind of compliment is very meaningful.

2. Take a new kind of training class. If you are a current foster or adoptive parent, consider stepping out of your comfort zone with a new training class this year. For example, maybe you've never fostered teens, but have been thinking about it for awhile. A teen-focused training would be a great way to explore the idea and ask questions.

3. Thank a social worker. Social workers have a tough and sometimes thankless job. How about brightening someone's day with a simple card thanking them for choosing this field and for the difficult work they do for kids and families?

4. Write your legislator. Handwritten letters can make a big impact on legislators, who get countless emails and form letters. Tell your legislator that you hope he or she will support initiatives this year that benefit kids and families and provide support for youth in foster care. IFAPA has some great resources posted about legislative issues involving foster care and adoption in Iowa.

5. Be a friend. If you really want to do something special this year, consider getting involved as a mentor or permanency partner with a teen in foster care or a young adult who has recently aged out of the system. Even simple support, like sharing life advice on getting a car loan or renting an apartment or just being there to listen when someone needs to talk, can make a big difference. Check out some great ideas from Foster Club. You can also connect with Iowa youth in care through Elevate.

Did you make any New Year's resolutions this year? Let us know how it's going!

Holiday cheer

2010-12-16T13:29:00.003-06:00

Every year a group of Iowa women put together a pretty special gift for Iowa's waiting children. Formerly called Circle of Support and now known as Herizons, this group is a central Iowa support and mentoring initiative for women who were previously incarcerated and are now transitioning back into the community.

For several years now, these women have donated handmade Christmas stockings, decorated with everything from carefully counted cross-stitch to fun fabric paints, for Iowa children waiting to be adopted. Each one is filled with small gifts for the boy or girl who will be receiving it.

Especially during the holidays, this is an amazing way to show children in foster care that people in their community care about them! Thanks to the women who created these special gifts!

From all of us at Iowa KidsNet, we wish you a wonderful holiday season. We're grateful for all of Iowa's foster and adoptive families and our friends and partners who advocate on behalf of Iowa children. Thank you!

Finding a forever family at 19

2010-11-22T16:07:00.001-06:00

Yesterday the Des Moines Register ran a terrific feature about a 19-year-old in Des Moines who was adopted this year, after aging out of foster care and wondering if she would ever have a permanent family. It's similar to the story we shared last week about another young adult, Larry, 21, who will be adopted this month.

I had the privilege of talking to Sam in the weeks leading up to her adoption this summer, and she's an amazing young person. Congratulations to Sam and her family as we celebrate National Adoption Month!

My favorite quote from her in the Register's story: "Now you have a family. Now you have somewhere to go for the holidays, someone to call for advice, to celebrate birthdays," Sam said. "For the first time ever, I have someone to call Dad. I have someone to walk me down the aisle. My children will have a grandpa."

Powerful stuff. You can read the full story here.

Want to learn about how you can support youth aging out of foster care? Two great places to start are Foster Club and Elevate, a local youth advocacy organization here in Iowa.

Balloon release video

2010-11-18T09:34:00.001-06:00

Thanks to everyone who made our balloon release for National Adoption Month a success! Check out the video of some of the celebrations around the state.

Adopted at 21

2010-11-18T09:26:00.001-06:00

Some stories truly melt your heart.

Last Christmas I had the opportunity to talk to a family in western Iowa who was in the process of adopting their former foster son, now an adult. Sometimes these journeys take time, and so I was so excited this month to hear from the mother, Renee, that her family will be finally be adopting Larry this Thanksgiving.

It's pretty rare for a teen in foster care to be adopted, let alone a 21-year-old. Larry came to live with this family when he was just 13, facing some tough issues. "He was only our second foster placement," said Renee, "and he was in residential care at the time, waiting to be adopted. We drove 3 and half hours every weekend to visit him before he came to live with us."

Larry and the family still had a tough road ahead of them. He had greater needs then the family could meet at the time, and so he moved back to treatment and other homes for several years. But he always managed to keep finding his way back to Renee's family. And now he's finding ways to help others.

"I was an EMT when Larry first lived with us," said Renee, "and he would always tell kids at school that he was dispatching his mom to calls."

Larry's the one being dispatched now, after he recently earned his EMT certification and a job with the ambulance crew at his local fire department. It's easy to see who inspired him to achieve that dream.

"It's amazing that something could have such an impact in such a short amount of time," said Renee.

We hope this family has a seriously amazing Thanksgiving together and a time of celebration. Each year 29,000 youth age out of foster care without ever finding a forever family or having the support of a caring adult in their life to help them succeed.

Here's the truth of National Adoption Month. Everyone deserves a permanent, safe and loving place to call home. Larry's story reminds us that we're never too old to find family or create that family with the people who are closest to us.

A coffee break with Jason

2010-11-10T11:44:00.001-06:00

Today we’re excited to share another family’s foster care and adoption journey with you! Jason and Chuck have adopted five children from foster care in the past four and half years.

Hi! Thanks for sharing your great story with us! Tell us a little about your family and how your journey began.

Jason: We’ve fostered seven children in the past four and half years. We adopted five of them. The other two were infants and we wanted to adopt them also. Their mother was sick from child birth, but was able to get well enough to get her children back. It was wonderful she got better and we were happy to help. When they were able to go home, we sent them home with bags of new clothes. The parents were grateful for everything we did for those girls. Sometimes people tell us they could never foster because it would break their hearts to ever see the kids leave and go back to their birth parents.

I learned that this is a backwards way of thinking. We do not foster just to make ourselves feel good. We foster to give children a safe and loving home. Sometimes that can be for a lifetime, but sometimes it is just for a few weeks. The truth of the matter is that even though we fostered those girls for just a few weeks, we felt good knowing we helped them and their family in a time of need.

How did you end up adopting?

We got a phone call about a baby girl and her one year old brother. They were in a foster home and in need of an adoptive home. We drove to their town to meet them. A couple of days later they were in our home and a year later we were in court adopting them! Besides these two children, we also adopted three other boys. Two of these boys are biological brothers, and the third boy is their cousin. It was important to us to keep those family connections.

What advice would you give to other people considering becoming foster or adoptive parents?

I remember getting my hair cut by a young woman at Cost Cutters and telling her about my kids and the adoptions. She and her husband had no children. She always wanted to adopt, but her husband feared if they tried to adopt a foster child the child might go back to the birth parents. He didn’t want to risk that pain. Every time I got my hair cut I told her about the free classes to learn more about fostering and adoption. I explained that sometimes there are children in foster care who are already available for adoption, and there is no fear of those kids returning home.

I always wondered if this woman took my advice, and about a year later I ran into her at a rummage sale. She came up to me all in smiles, and she was excited to tell me they were in the process of adopting a baby girl! Last week I ran into her again and her two year old daughter was with her. I felt so happy inside knowing this child would be raised in such a loving home. I always wonder how many other loving families would adopt or foster if they knew the facts about it. And if they knew the blessings.

Make no mistake. It takes a lot of hard work. Parenting any child is work. But when you adopt children from the foster care system, they often have more issues than your average kid. They need a safe and loving home and parents they can depend on. It’s the hardest thing we’ve ever done in many ways. But it’s also the best blessing we’ve ever had in our life.

People always say to us, “Thank God that these children were lucky enough to get you as parents.” I always tell them they have that backwards. We are the lucky ones to have these children in our lives!

Iowa's truly lucky to have some amazing foster and adoptive parents. If you're on Facebook, be sure to check out our Blind Side giveaway today. Each Wednesday in November we're giving away one copy of the hit film The Blind Side. See details here on Facebook. Thanks!

Happy National Adoption Month!

2010-11-01T16:33:00.001-05:00

Happy National Adoption Month! Today's the first day of a month-long whirlwind of raising awareness about the 114,000 children in the U.S. who are waiting to be adopted from foster care. It's also a time to celebrate the people who make a difference in their lives - foster and adoptive families, caseworkers, advocates, volunteers, mentors and many others.

I've already had the privilege of hearing some great adoption stories today. Hopefully we'll have the chance to share some of these with you throughout the month!

As we start this month of celebration, enjoy this video from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, reminding us of what it's all about:

P.S. To say thanks for helping us spread the word this November, we'll be hosting a fun little giveaway on Facebook. Join us on Facebook each Wednesday in November for the chance to win a free copy of the movie The Blind Side. Hope to see you there!

When life is Not.So.TV.

2010-10-29T09:53:00.001-05:00

About 29,000 youth age out of foster care every year without the support they need to succeed. Janessa, a foster care alum and social work student at the University of Northern Iowa, graciously agreed to share how support made a difference for her. She's now very involved in giving back to youth in care, and we hope to hear more from her in the future! Here's Janessa's story:

Entering foster care

At 21, I recognize that life is like a card game in a sense. It’s not always about winning or losing, but instead how you deal the cards that you are dealt. I could spend all my time searching for answers and asking questions as like, “Why me?” If this were the case I would not be who I am, or where I am today.

Mahatma Ghandi said, “The future depends on what we do in the present.”

I entered the Iowa foster care system just one month after I turned 14. I was in the 8th grade. My mom at the time was dealing with issues of her own that were getting in the way of her ability to parent, so the State saw fit that my two sisters and me be removed from the home. Immediately we were split up. I went to a youth shelter and my sisters went to live with my grandparents. This was a huge challenge for me. I had already been taken from the only thing I knew (home) and now I was being separated from the only two people who I’d had naturally bonded with my whole life.

“Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt to you represents determinism; the way you play it is free will.” Jawaharal Nehru

At a young age I decided that no matter what I was going through I would persevere. My only option was to move forward. I pledged to keep my head on straight regardless of what my peers had to say, what my family had to say, and regardless of what statistics claimed my future would be. My reality at the time did not have to determine my destiny.

I don’t want to give anyone the impression that this was easy. I’m not superwoman, and I never will be! I’ve experienced feelings of rejection, loneliness, and even depression as many other foster kids can attest to. There were many nights that I didn’t believe I would make it through.

Reason to believe

Today, I am a college student, actively involved on a foster care youth board called Elevate, and a young advocate for youth in the foster care system. Looking back on my foster care experience I have many people to credit to my successes. Without the help of several supportive adults there is no way I would be where I am today. Having people like my social worker, GAL (Guardian At Litem), CASA worker, and TLP worker recognize my goals, talents, and encourage me through education and personal development gave me reason to believe in myself.

To learn more about how to become involved in the life of a current or former foster youth, visit Foster Club or contact your local Department of Human Services.

“…The recognition and support of those around you is nurturing.” -Rosemarie Rossetti

Not.So.TV

Janessa is helping raise awareness about the real life challenges of young people today through a documentary series called Not.So.TV. Check out her promo video below!

Princesses and Pirates

2010-10-27T14:40:00.000-05:00

One great thing about adopting in the state of Iowa is that if you have a subsidized foster care adoption, you’ll automatically qualify for free post-adoption support services from Iowa KidsNet.

These services can help families with all kind of issues, such as a behavioral problem or crisis, navigating a school or birth family issue and more. If you’re a subsidized adoptive family and are interested in these services, please call us at 1.800.243.0756. You’ll be assigned your own support specialist who will create a plan specifically for your family.

To say thank you to adoptive families this November, we’ll be hosting a special adoption respite event in Des Moines called “Princesses and Pirates” on Nov. 7. Adoptive parents (those with a subsidized foster care adoption) will be able to spend an afternoon shopping or relaxing in Des Moines while we host fun activities, treats, crafts and a magic show for their kids at the Des Moines Botanical Center!

Why Princesses and Pirates? For one thing, it’ll keep the Halloween costume fun going into November. And because every child deserves the opportunity to simply be a kid – having fun and imagining they can be anything they want to be. That’s what great foster and adoptive families allow them to do every day!

If you’re an adoptive family in our Navigator program, look for details coming your way soon.

Who is your favorite pirate or princess character in a book or movie? Let us know!

Events coming up in November!

2010-10-15T14:11:00.001-05:00

We are in full swing planning for November's National Adoption Month! There are over 114,000 children in U.S. foster care who are waiting to be adopted. Some children may wait five years or more, which is a lifetime to a child. We hope you'll save the date for one of the exciting events happening in Iowa to help raise awareness:

Nov. 6 - Statewide balloon launch (locations TBA)
Nov. 6 - Kids Expo in Dubuque
Nov. 7 - Princesses and Pirates in Des Moines (A fun respite event for adoptive families. Details TBA)
Nov. 13-14 - Adoption Retreat at Camp Ewalu in Strawberry Point
Nov. 19 - Cedar Rapids Adoption Friday
Nov. 20 - National Adoption Day!
Nov. 20 - Des Moines Adoption Saturday
Nov. 20 - Sioux City Adoption Saturday
Nov. 20 - Webster City Adoption Saturday
Nov. 20 - Council Bluffs Adoption Saturday
Nov. 20 - Davenport Adoption Fair

You can keep up with event details at our website. Even if you can't attend an event, there are many things during National Adoption Month that you can do to help! Learn the facts about foster care adoption, ask your faith community to participate in an event such as Orphan Sunday, or learn how you can support youth aging out of foster care through Elevate or Foster Club.

Foster a Smile.

2010-10-12T10:12:00.001-05:00

Here's something that put a smile on our faces this week. Foster A Smile is a network of professional photographers who volunteer their time to take free senior photos for teens in foster care. It's an awesome cause that makes sure Iowa high school seniors in foster care get the great photos they deserve.

Sarah Moore of Boone, Iowa, started this statewide network. Here's what she has to say on their website about why it's so important:

"Through my personal volunteer work, I've learned that only 50% of foster youth in Iowa graduate from high school. Nationally, only 20% attend college and of these, only 3% will graduate, even though 70% of foster youth want to go to college. The point is, that it's a big deal for a foster youth to graduate from high school...and they rarely get senior pictures. In the grand scheme of things, senior pictures may not be all that important―but it's a lifetime keepsake of a huge accomplishment for these youth."

We hope you'll check out their website, and help spread the word!

Up, up, and away! Join us for a balloon launch.

2010-10-07T11:29:00.000-05:00

- Ames Adoption Saturday '09 -

Interested in a fun way to help celebrate National Adoption Month?

We're planning a statewide balloon launch on Nov. 6 at 2 p.m. at locations across Iowa - with the goal of raising awareness about children in foster care and those waiting to be be adopted!

Each site will release 40 biodegradeable balloons, representing 100 children per balloon.

But, we can't do it without you! We're looking for volunteers to either help coordinate a site in their area or simply be present to celebrate with us during the balloon release. This is a kid-friendly event, so bring the whole family!

To sign up or get more details, please contact the local Iowa KidsNet recruiter in your area. Click here.

Hope to see you there on Nov. 6! We'll post a full list of all the locations as we line up the sites during October.

Thanks!

Another angel in adoption

2010-09-24T08:41:00.008-05:00

Today we're excited for you to meet the other Iowa Angels in Adoption nominees, Julie and Charles from Council Bluffs. With six children in their home, you might imagine they would be a little busy, but Julie graciously took the time to answer some questions for us. Thanks Julie!

First, congratulations on your award! What a terrific honor. How did you get involved with foster care?

"My husband Charles and I started our journey in 2006. I'd always been interested in fostering and adoption even before we got married. After a couple of years of marriage, we decided we were ready to open our hearts and home to children and families. We could have never imagined where this road would take us."

Tell us a little bit about your family.

"We have fostered over 25 boys and girls, from a two-day old baby to a 16-year-old. We've been blessed to adopt Noah, 3, Elizabeth, 10, and Josie, 7. We'll be finalizing adoptions of three more children this fall, including a sibling group on National Adoption Day."

As a Congressional Angel in Adoption, you'll be traveling to Washington, D.C. this fall. What do you hope to accomplish?

"We hope to continue to advocate for children in the system and also their birth families in many cases. We'd like to meet with legislators to talk to them about the importance of the time frames for children and families and really put a face to the children, instead of a statistic. We're also an Iowa KidsNet ambassador family, and I teach PS-MAPP classes so we truly feel a need to find wonderful homes for our children, whether they're temporary through foster care or permanent through adoption."

Do you have any words of advice for those considering foster care or adoption from foster care?

"Keep an open mind. Each child is an individual, and don't rule out older children. Every child deserves a place to call home and someone to call their family. Know there will be twists and turns, but the journey is so worth it. Every child needs love, but also keep yourself informed with trainings on behaviors and other issues. Also, reach out for support, whether through your Iowa KidsNet support worker or other foster parents. We may never know the impact we may have on our children, but we will never forget the impact they have had on us!"

Thanks Julie! We wish your family well as you enjoy this honor and new adventure! You can learn more about the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute and the Angels in Adoption program here. If you're reading, can you remember an "angel" who made a difference in your life? We'd love to hear about it.

An angel in adoption

2010-09-20T08:28:00.005-05:00

Every fall each member of Congress gets to pick one constituent to honor as an "Angel in Adoption," for their extraordinary contributions on behalf of children in need of homes.

Iowa is honoring three terrific individuals this year- Charles and Julie Lamb of Council Bluffs and Teresa Sea of Iowa City.

We'd like to introduce you to Teresa this week. She's been a DHS worker for over 20 years, currently serving as a transition planning specialist to help teens aging out of foster care. Jackie Hammers-Crowell, a foster care alum and a support person for the Cedar Rapids Elevate Chapter, helped nominate Teresa and shares why Teresa is so special to her:

"Teresa first entered my life when I was in college and was chosen as a recipient of the Iowa Foster Child Grant. As part of her DHS duties, Teresa would check in on me and other recipients once per month to verify we were attending our classes and give us info about resources. Teresa always went above and beyond for me - running me for groceries, sending me birthday cards, taking phone calls off the clock when I needed to vent about a class or family issues, etc."

"Knowing Teresa has truly changed my life."

"She has helped many other kids as well. Teresa used to volunteer her weekends altering secondhand prom dresses for teenagers in group care, and she has also been part of the Iowa Youth Dream Teams initiative locally, attending meetings for numerous youth and encouraging them to chase their dreams. To this day, Teresa continues to support foster care youth and alumni by supporting not one, but two Elevate chapters. Teresa is an amazing human being and an asset to DHS, foster children and the community at large."

Powerful proof that it only takes one person to make a difference for youth in foster care.

Congratulations to Teresa and the many other nominees. Thanks for making a difference!

A coffee break with Rachelle

2010-07-13T13:13:00.000-05:00

Did you know Iowa KidsNet offers free adoption support services? It's a great service to help families along their journey and through any challenges they may face after adopting a child from foster care. For example, a family may need support for a child struggling in school or advice in navigating a birth family relationship.

Today we'll chat with Rachelle, a post-adoption support specialist in northwest Iowa. Rachelle is a former peer liasion with the Iowa Foster and Adoptive Parents Association and understands foster care on a personal level as a foster and adoptive parent.

Hi Rachelle! Thanks for joining us. Let's start by learning about you and your family.

My husband I have opened our home to more than 30 children in the past 14 years. Through the years of fostering, we also have adopted. We now have six children and recently became grandparents. It's been a journey I can't imagine not taking.

That's terrific. What prompted you to become a foster parent?

For as long as I can remember, it's been something I wanted to do. Growing up, I had an aunt that did foster care, and she inspired me to become a foster parent. My family has been extremely blessed. It's taught us so much.

Over the years, you've probably received lots of questions about foster care. What's the strangest question you hear?

The most bizzare question I get asked would be "Which ones are yours?" I'm sure this is not a surprise to other foster and adoptive parents. I reply with a smile, of course, "they are all mine."

Tell us a little about your job as a support specialist for adoptive families.

As a support specialist, I provide support to families who need someone to listen, find resources and develop a plan that will help keep the home safe and stable for a child. It's such a rewarding job, and I love it.

Is there a support tip you find yourself giving out often?

A lot of support I provide to families is simply showing an understanding of what they're going through with empathy and without judgment. As a support specialist, I try to make myself available anytime, even nights or weekends. If a family is in crisis, I want to help.

That's great. We've talked before about how supporting families is not a 9-5 service. Anything else you'd like to add?

I truly have a passion for children and the parents that care for them. I have adopted and know both the joys and frustrations that journey can bring to the whole family. The time and dedication families give to children is admirable and honorable. It's my sincere privilege to support our families in any way that I can.

Thanks Rachelle! Does anyone have questions about adoption support? Otherwise, you can learn more here on our website.

A coffee break with Marlene

2010-07-06T11:20:00.003-05:00

It's time to introduce you to another one of our great ambassador families. These foster and adoptive parents are helping Iowa KidsNet raise awareness about foster care within their networks of friends, neighbors and communities.

Today we'll talk to Marlene, our Cedar Rapids ambassador family. Marlene and her husband have adopted three boys from foster care, ages 11, 8, and 7, who are all biological siblings.

Hi Marlene! Can you start by telling us how you got involved with foster care?

My husband and I dealt with infertility issues early on in our marriage. We decided that we would be okay without children and for seven years we were. But then my biological clock started ticking as I approached 30. So, since I am adopted, it was a natural choice for us to become parents through adoption. We completed PS-MAPP training classes and became licensed in 2005.

Thanks for your involvement as an ambassador family! What have you been up to?

First, let me say that I'm glad the ambassador family program exists, but I would do this work regardless. As an ambassador family, I wrote an editorial that was printed in the Iowa City Press-Citizen, and I made a guest appearance on a local radio show during National Foster Care Month in May.

My Facebook profile has a link to Iowa KidsNet's website, and I try to include sayings or quotes about foster parenting or adoption. I also obtained permission from the University of Iowa School of Social Work to place brochures in their resource rack. I look forward to doing some additional activities this summer.

(Marlene's editorial was wonderful, by the way. Here's the link, but unfortunately it's available to view only by purchase or if you already have an account on the website.)

We sometimes refer to foster and adoptive families as everyday heroes. In that case, what is your foster and adoptive parent superpower?

Well, I have a big mouth naturally, so I'd say my superpower is using it to advocate for kids.

What do you think is the biggest myth about foster parenting or children in care?

There are a few. One is that we are in it for the money. We may be in it for something, but I guarantee it isn't money since it only covers part of a child's expenses, and it will never be enough to compensate for extra appointments, loss of privacy, behaviors and a loss of sleep. Another common myth is that all foster children need is love. That's a good start, but it also takes patience, in some cases therapy, a sense of humor, a lot of prayer and more therapy.

Is there a special moment that sticks out from your foster care journey?

That's easy. I had no clue that my kids' former foster parents, siblings, and their adoptive families would become so much a part of our family, but that's exactly what happened. If you remember, we have three adopted sons. They are all biological brothers, and they are part of a sibling group of six. Their siblings are adopted by two other families who we try to see monthly.

Something happened along the way - the sibling visits became something we enjoyed and looked forward to versus something we were doing only because it was the right thing to do. Before we knew it, we were going on weekend trips together and celebrating family birthdays. As for the former foster family of two of our boys, they have become close friends to us and surrogate grandparents to all of our boys.

That's great to hear. It's so important to keep those sibling bonds when possible. Last question. What are three essential qualities a foster parent should have?

Every foster or adoptive parent should be flexible, able to laugh and have a never ending supply of hugs and kisses.

Thanks for joining us Marlene! Anything else to add?

Becoming an adoptive parent has been the hardest and best thing I have ever done. I have the children that God intended for me, and my experience has sparked such a passion for working with children that I went back to school and now I'm working toward a master's degree in social work.

Thanks to all our ambassador families for raising awareness about the needs of children in foster care!

A coffee break with Dawn

2010-07-02T08:42:00.004-05:00

Today we're lucky to have Dawn join us for a "coffee break." Dawn is an Iowa KidsNet licensing supervisor and service coordinator in Western Iowa. If you're a foster parent in that neck of the woods, you might know her - she's been working with foster parents for the past 24 years!

Thanks Dawn for taking some questions! As a licensing supervisor, give us one essential tip for families who are in the process of completing their home studies.

It is essential to know the needs of your family and how that will fit with a foster or adoptive child's needs. Take what you learn during PS-MAPP training and use it to understand what a foster child will be experiencing. Consider your own experiences and family needs, and see what you need to do before you start taking placements so that you are well prepared. Then, talk with the family and licensing worker about this openly and honestly.

What's the most commonly asked licensing question you hear from families?

It seems like every family wants to know "how long will it take before a child is placed in my home?" I remind them that we're looking for families to meet an individual child's needs, and we can't predict what those needs will be. The kids we have coming into foster care are often sibling groups, teenagers and children with special needs. If you are able to care for those children, you may have a much shorter wait.

Name three qualities that help make a good foster parent.

Patience, sense of humor, and ability to work with others in a flexible manner.

Sense of humor is a must! After so many years in the field, you must have great stories. Can you share one of your favorites?

I've always enjoyed supporting and working with those families who foster teenagers. The story that holds the most meaning for me involved a meeting with a 17-year-old boy, his foster parents and his father. This boy, like many teens, desperately wanted to be on his own. He had many challenges when he first entered foster care, but by now he was a better student and didn't need any special assistance. The father encouraged his son to stay in foster care and finish high school, saying that he felt remaining in foster care would be like an "insurance policy" that his son would graduate.

That young man did graduate. Today he's a hardworking adult and father, and he's successful primarily because of the encouragement he got and still gets from his foster parents. I see this story over and over for teens that get the right attention and care in foster care. I love the commitment that our foster parents have for their foster children!

Last question. What's your advice to someone considering becoming a foster parent?

Be honest about why you're considering it. It really does have to be about meeting a child's needs and not your own needs. Go into the process with an open mind and recognize that nothing worthwhile is easy. Being a foster parent is truly worthwhile!

Thanks to Dawn for sharing some insights and stories with us. Hope everyone has a safe and spectacular Fourth of July weekend!

Happy Friday, and Four New Campaign Photos!

2010-06-25T15:47:00.022-05:00

Happy Friday afternoon everyone!

Today we posted some of the photos from the "I Did It" foster parent recruitment campaign on our website. Check out the terrific photos of Brandy, Christina, Sunshine and Linda, as well as their reasons for why they decided to become foster parents:

Christina - "I did it because I could. I knew my husband and I could be thoughtful, compassionate and supportive parents. We knew we could provide a loving and nurturing home to a child who needed one."

Brandy - "I did it because I've been in their shoes. In junior high and high school I was in foster care for six years. My foster family had such a positive impact on my life - it made me want to become a foster parent."

Sunshine - "I did it because of my sister. Growing up, my sister was in foster care. When she later became a foster parent, she inspired my husband and me to think, Hey, we can do this. Now we help sisters stick together by fostering sibling groups and other Iowa kids."

Linda - "I did it because two kids in my church needed a home. When two girls we knew were placed in a shelter, we thought we could just drive over and pick them up. We ended up becoming licensed foster parents to take care of them. Twenty years later we're still fostering."

Thanks foster parents for all you do, and the many powerful reasons behind it. If you're thinking about doing foster care, tell us - what would be your reason? We'd love to hear.

Have a good weekend! If you're looking for something fun to do this weekend, head to our Facebook page - people have been posting some great suggestions!

5 Things to Know About Matching Calls

2010-06-16T09:14:00.008-05:00

Wondering why you haven't received a call for a foster placement in awhile? We hear that question from foster families every now and then, so here's a few things to consider if you've been in that boat.

1. Talk to your support specialist. A good first step is to always let your support specialist know your questions. He or she can talk to you about what's going on in your local area, what the needs are in your community and make sure all your information is correct and updated.

2. Remember it's about the best possible match. When a child enters foster care, we're looking to find the best possible family to meet that child's specfic needs. Maybe the child has a pet allergy. Maybe she has past trauma that makes her uncomfortable with a male parent. Maybe there are several siblings who need to stay together if possible.

It's also important for a child's stability to keep them in the same school district if possible and close to their birth family for visits, since reunification is the ultimate goal. By having a large pool of available foster families, there's a better chance we'll find a great match for that child or sibling group. The Department of Human Services then makes the final decision where to place a child.

3. Give us a call after a child leaves your home. When a child leaves your home, Iowa KidsNet doesn't receive instant notification of that discharge. If you give us a call and let us know, then we'll know your home has space for another child sooner rather than later.

3. Do respite care. Doing respite care for other foster families is a great foster parenting opportunity. It will also help you build your network of support with other foster families in your area. Then, when you do have a child in your home, they could provide respite care for you!

4. Think about your family profile. You may eventually want to take a look at your family's preferences. Are the children coming into care in your area the kinds of children you would be willing to care for? If not, you may want to examine if you could be a great match for other groups of kids. We know our families put careful consideration into what their family strengths are during PS-MAPP training, so do some homework first if you're thinking about making a change. For example, if you're thinking about fostering teens, talk to other families who foster older youth and ask your support specialist for advice. You could do respite care for a teen.

5. Take advantage of training. The Iowa Foster and Adoptive Parents Association (IFAPA) offers many great and free trainings to foster and adoptive parents. Take advantage and build your foster parenting skills so you'll be ready for the next child you welcome to your home!

Iowa's lucky to have many great foster families across the state. Thanks for all you do, and being willing to step up for kids who need safe and nurturing homes!

Does anyone have questions about our matching process?

The power of one

2010-05-21T16:24:00.000-05:00

Last night I heard a single mom speak about the challenge of trying to go back to school while affording child care for her three kids, and a young woman talk about her difficulty in accessing quality mental health care after first attempting suicide at age 12.

They weren't stories about foster care, but they reminded me how powerful just one person's voice can be. How powerful it can be when we encourage the people most affected by an issue to share their voice. To share their story.

The National Resource Center for Permanency and Family Connections provided that opportunity recently when they launched their Digital Stories From the Field project.

It's a collection of stories about the child welfare system, told from the voices of those who know it best - foster youth, their families, social workers, judges, advocates and many others.

Check out Josh's video where he talks about journey of shuffling through foster homes and schools and how supportive adults made a difference. He's now working toward the goal of a master's degree in social work.

Or listen to Bernadette's story, a mom who vividly describes the day her children were placed in foster care and how her journey unfolded from that moment.

It's those kinds of stories, those powerful and personal truths, that we need to hear during National Foster Care Month and all year long.

An "I Did It" moment with Brandy

2010-05-18T11:10:00.005-05:00

First Lady Mari Culver will help us honor Iowa's great foster families for National Foster Care Month and unveil our new foster family recruitment campaign - featuring real Iowa foster parents - on May 24 @ 11 a.m. at the Capitol in Des Moines!

We'd love for you to join us - we'll be in the rotunda, second floor.

In the meantime, see a sneak peek into our photo shoot for the new campaign with the video below. Joe Crimmings of Joe Crimmings Photography generously donated his time and awesome talent to this project to help us raise awareness about Iowa's foster kids. Thanks Joe!

Brandy, an Iowa foster mom, shares about her personal reasons for doing foster care:

Am I too old to be a foster parent? Debunking myths of foster care

2010-04-29T10:04:00.002-05:00

I was chatting with a foster parent yesterday, a wonderful woman, who shared her story of how she became a foster parent 18 years ago.

Back then, she had called her local agency to ask if a single woman could become a foster parent, not sure if that was allowed. The agency was happy to inform her she could, and ever since she's been fostering Iowa youth, from teen mothers to infants to kids with special needs.

As we head into May's National Foster Care Month, it's a great time to share a few other myths about foster care.

1. Myth. You have to be married and a homeowner to be a foster parent. Fact. Foster parents come from all walks of life. Some are single, some are renters, some have kids and others don't. And foster parents come from all racial, religious and ethnic backgrounds and sexual orientations.

2. Myth. Kids are in foster care because they've done something wrong. Fact. Not true. Kids enter foster care because their biological family is currently unable to provide a safe or nurturing home. The ultimate goal of foster care is for kids to be able to return safely home to their biological families if possible.

3. Myth. Foster families are superheroes. Fact. While we do think our foster families are pretty awesome and extraordinary, the truth is they're ordinary families. And they'll be the first to tell you that! Foster parents are everyday, down-to-earth people who for many different reasons chose to step up for a child who needed a home. So, if you've been thinking you don't have what it takes, you might be surprised!

4. Myth. I'm too old to be a foster parent. Fact. You have to be 21 years old to be a foster parent in Iowa, and after that your age is only a consideration if it affects your ability to care for a specific child. In fact, I heard a nice story yesterday about a 68-year-old woman who is fostering several teenage boys. Older foster parents can be great - often, they have previous parenting experience or can share a wealth of wisdom and life experiences with youth.

5. Myth. Once I become a foster parent, I'm on my own. Fact. As child welfare has evolved, so has support for families. In Iowa, foster parents now have a really good support network with every foster family being assigned their own support specialist. Check out more about support here.

What are some myths you've heard about foster care? Or things that have surprised you? We'd love to hear.

5 Things You'll Like About PS-MAPP

2010-04-19T16:52:00.000-05:00

Before you become a foster parent in Iowa, you're required to take a 30-hour series of classes over 10 weeks called PS-MAPP. It stands for Partnering for Safety and Permanency - a Model Approach to Partnerships in Parenting. Or in simpler words, a class to prepare you for foster or adoptive parenting.

30 hours, you say? That's a lot! It is a lot, but those 30 hours will prepare you to impact a child's life in a way that lasts forever. And I think that's a pretty good return on the investment of your time, don't you? :)

Here's 5 things you'll like about PS-MAPP.

1. You'll find out who the kids are. You'll learn about why children enter the foster care system and the reasons behind why they need a home, whether that's a temporary foster home or possibly a permanent home through adoption. You may even get to hear from local teens in foster care about their personal experience.

2. You'll learn why foster and adoptive parents are so special. You'll get a better understanding of what makes a foster parent or adoptive parent role so unique. For example, foster parents not only have the opportunity to change the life of a child, but they can have a profound impact on a child's parents as well by being a positive role model.

3. Class can actually be fun. We do hear from most participants that they have fun with the training. Part of that, our trainers say, is because the classes are team-taught in an interactive way with a social worker and experienced foster or adoptive parent as your leaders.

4. You'll get plenty of names for future babysitters. PS-MAPP helps you build a network of support. You'll be sharing your class experience with other individuals who probably have many of the same questions, concerns and hopes that you do. It's a great opportunity to build new friendships with other parents - parents who may someday be able to provide respite care for you as a fellow foster parent.

5. A chance to make an informed decision. PS-MAPP class is not only training for foster care, but an opportunity to give you all the information you need to decide if foster care or adoption is right for your family. No matter what you decide, it should be a worthwhile experience. You'll have learned a lot of valuable information about yourself and your family that will be useful no matter what you do going forward.

Here's what a few families have said about PS-MAPP class:

"It's eye-opening and helps prepare you."
"It will change your perception of fostering and adoption."
"The time is worth the knowledge gained."
"The information learned can be used in many life situations."
"It helps you build relationships with other parents."
"A must-do if you want to be an effective and positive foster parent."

Are you ready to be a foster parent? Take a self-assessment, and find out.

What do you think about PS-MAPP? How did it help prepare you for foster parenting? Or, what kinds of things would you want to learn about foster parenting in your classes?

Why did you do foster care?

2010-04-14T16:00:00.012-05:00

We are in full swing with preparations for May's National Foster Care Month and are excited about what'll be happening next month - from special showings of The Blind Side to a free spoken-word, jazz and rap entertainment event that will raise awareness about Iowa's need for more African American foster families. Keep checking our events page or Facebook for updates, and I'll include more info on the blog as it gets closer.

One endeavor we're very excited about is launching a new marketing campaign for recruiting foster families! Based on the theme "I did it because . . .", the campaign will share reasons why real families decided to do foster care and ask community members to consider what their reason for doing foster care would be. Here's a few of the powerful responses we've received so far, when posing this question to staff members and current families:

I did it for my grandchildren.
I did it for my people.
I did it because we weren't ready to be empty nesters.
I did it because I was one. I was in foster care for six years.
I did it because I am blessed.
I did it because their birth mom asked for help.

So, if you're a foster parent, why did you do do foster care? Or, if you're considering it, what would your reason be?

Who would you call at 2:30 a.m.?

2010-03-31T14:58:00.006-05:00

What comes to mind when you think of the word "support"?

A friend who listens to your bad day? The frustration of being on hold with tech support?

Lately, when I hear the word support I think about a 2:30 a.m. phone call.

2:30 a.m. is when Karen, an Iowa KidsNet support specialist, recently got a call from one of her foster families. The foster mom was having chest pains, and the dad wondered if Karen could stay with the young children in their home while he and his wife went to the emergency room.

Karen lived across town, but she made it to their house while the ambulance was still there.

“I would be there in the middle of the night for any of my families who needed me," she said when she told me this story.

Imagine the family's relief. Not having to worry about the kids, because a skilled professional was there. Because Karen had a trusted relationship with their family. Because she already knew each child in their home.

Fortunately, the parents were okay and back home by sunrise. We welcomed 63 new resource families in February, and one of the best things as they begin their journey of helping Iowa kids is that they don't have to do it alone.

Each of Iowa's resource families is assigned a support specialist to help meet their specific needs and even create a unique plan for their family. Obviously, not every family will have a middle-of-the-night-crisis, and your support specialist may not always be able to be on hand within minutes, like Karen was.

But knowing you have a go-to person you can always call, whether it's with a simple question or something more complex - that's what makes this kind of support so valuable.

Who's the "go-to-person" in your life? Your best friend? A sister? Your parents? Leave a comment, and let us know!

A coffee break with Alicia and Mike

2010-03-24T13:33:00.007-05:00

I'm so excited this week to introduce you to one of our Iowa KidsNet ambassador families! This is a program Iowa KidsNet started last fall with some great foster and adoptive families across the state. They're helping us raise awareness about Iowa children in foster care and the need for more foster families by reaching out to their personal contacts of family, friends, neighbors, coworkers and their local community.

Alicia and Mike are an ambassador family in the Waterloo service area.

Hi ambassadors! So, tell us a little about your family.
We have a 20-year-old daughter, an 18-year-old son, an 11-year-old son and a 22-month-old son. We also have a 12-year-old foster daughter and an 18-year-old foster son.

Wow, you're a busy family! When did you become foster parents?
We have been foster parents for a little over two years now. We decided to become foster parents because we wanted to adopt. During our journey to become foster parents our perspective changed, and we decided to foster as well.

What is something that has surprised you about foster parenting?
First, we were surprised at just how much we love it. We were also surprised that at most times it is very easy to work together with birth families.

Name three qualities you think help make a good foster parent.
Empathy, a good sense of humor, and a true desire to make a difference in a child's life.

Any interesting or funny stories to share?
We had a 4-year-old girl in our care for about eight months. She had been with us for roughly six months at the time, and I was sitting at the computer doing some work and she was in the same room playing with her dolly. I would catch pieces of the conversation she was having with her doll, and at one point I had to stop working and smile as I heard her tell her dolly that it was time for her to get ready to go on a visit to see her "birth mommy."

We're super excited to have started our Ambassador program. What have you been up to as an ambassador family?
We participated in Charles City's Spook Walk in 2009. When the Charles City Public Library hosted the Heart Gallery, Alicia read a book about adoption to two different groups of children for story time. During the Charles Theater's showing of The Blind Side, we handed out, pens, magnets, brochures, and business cards as well as answered questions both before and after the movie.

We spoke with restaurant owners who have then put out table tents. We have talked with our local radio station who has since run public service announcements for Iowa KidsNet. We have also talked to a countless number of people, put up many posters, put out a large number of brochures, and handed out hundreds of pens.

That is awesome. Thanks for helping spread the word! Anything else you want to add?
We would just like to say that becoming foster and foster adoptive parents is one of the best things that we have ever done. It has made our marriage stronger because we have to work as a team. We are stronger as parents because of the different backgrounds we encounter. We have stronger children because they have learned patience and empathy. And we have a stronger family because we appreciate what we have even more.

Being an ambassador family has allowed us to meet some wonderful people and make new friends. We are now much more involved in our community than we were before. Most importantly we are involved in something that we are very passionate about. Children have the power to become anything they want to become if only given the chance. Maybe you or I will be the one who gives them that opportunity.

Thanks to Alicia and Mike for sharing a little glimpse into their lives as foster parents!

We hope to introduce you to more of our ambassador families across the state.

Alicia and Mike had a great point about how foster care has benefited their own family, as well as the kids they care for. If you're a foster parent, how do you think the experience has made you a stronger parent/spouse/family?

How camping connected one teen to his forever family

2010-02-24T09:31:00.009-06:00

Sorry for our absence over the last month! Hopefully, I can make it up by sharing a good story. :)

I spoke recently with Aimee, a member of Iowa KidsNet's matching team. Who's the matching team? These are the folks who receive the calls from the Department of Human Services (DHS) when they have a child who needs a foster home.

Our matching team then uses a database to identify and contact foster families who would be a good match for the child's needs, and we present the potential matches to the DHS caseworker for a final decision. You can read more details about the matching process here.

Anyway, the good story. This team member told me about a young man who had been in and out of foster care for several years now. A great young man, but he had some significant needs that required a very special family.

"It was a planned placement into foster care, and I think we called over 52 homes for him," Aimee said.

In the end, it was a tiny detail on his paperwork that caught her eye and helped find the right family.

"The thing that caught my attention was where it said he liked to go camping and be outside," she said. "I remembered I had talked to a family previously where the foster dad shared how much their family enjoyed camping and living in a rural area. I wondered if maybe that could be their connection."

The family had taken special needs children in the past, and when they found out about this young man's outdoor interests it sparked a response.

Each year over 20,000 youth age out of foster care without having been adopted or having the permanent support they need to make a successful leap into adulthood.

That won't be the case for this young man. Within a year after first coming to live with them, the family adopted him. He'll now have a forever family and the support he needs to succeed!

We often tell people thinking about foster care that they would be surprised how much they have to offer, just by sharing their interests and giving a child love and support in a stable home. This is a great example.

Hopefully, they'll enjoy many, many great family camping trips to come!

The power of one

2010-01-05T16:10:00.010-06:00

Remember back when you were first on your own as a young adult? Maybe you think about a first apartment or first job, or that first year of college.

When I started my freshman year of college, I knew I had family I could call at the end of a bad day and a home to go to for Thanksgiving dinner. Parents who didn't mind me dragging home a few loads of laundry, and nice folks at our church who sent care packages during finals week. When I graduated, there were people to celebrate with, friends to share advice on job hunting and family to help move everything into an apartment.

Sound familiar? If you were lucky enough to grow up with it, it's easy to take that kind of support for granted. To count on it without thinking about it, because it's simply there.

Each year about 20,000 young people age out of foster care without a permanent family. Without the support or resources to rely on to make a successful transition into young adulthood.

It's a staggering statistic, and it can be hard to know how to help. One creative and powerful example I love is the permanency pact, which is a tool designed by Foster Club. They imagined 45 different ways you could offer support to a young person who has no permanent family to rely on, everything from helping a teen wade through the college application process to something as simple as offering them a place to do laundry every once in awhile.

It's a good time to think about how we can support young people as January is National Mentoring Month. According to the National Mentoring Partnership, an estimated 17.6 million young people - nearly half the population of young people between 10 and 18 years of age - live in situations that put them at risk of not living up to their potential.

As powerful as that statistic is, what's just as powerful is the truth that it only takes one person - just one - to make a difference for a young person. We can all do something, whether it's volunteering as a mentor, committing to a child as a foster or adoptive parent or sending a care package.

Who were some of your mentors or role models? We'd love to hear about them.

Goodbye, 2009!

2009-12-30T09:26:00.008-06:00

As we say goodbye to 2009, here are a few of my favorite highlights from the year:

Welcome new families! In state fiscal year 2009, Iowa gained 532 new foster and adoptive families! Thanks to those who made this decision to help Iowa kids in such a unique way. Iowa's need for more foster and adoptive families will continue to be ongoing as kids continue to enter foster care and families leave the system.
Adoption Support. We connected more families with post-adoption support services and appointed adoption champions throughout the state to help form support networks for adoptive parents. Another awesome highlight was the support retreats that were held in several service areas for adoptive families.
Lights, camera, action. We added video interviews to our web site of some of the children who are waiting to be adopted in Iowa. Go here to meet some of them.
Ballpark bash for National Foster Care Month. Families from across the state joined us for a night of baseball and fun at the Iowa Cubs to honor foster families and children during May's National Foster Care Month. Danielle, daughter of a foster and adoptive family, threw out the first pitch!
Family Connections. Iowa KidsNet received an exciting three-year federal grant as part of the Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008. This particular grant will fund intensive efforts to locate relatives and help reestablish relationships for children who are at risk of or on the verge of entering foster care. The goal is to increase extended family support for kids and avoid or reduce the need for them to stay in foster care.
Adoption Saturday. Adoption Saturday was a success across the state, with events held in Ames, Cedar Rapids, Council Bluffs, Des Moines, Ottumwa and Sioux City. Congratulations to all the families and children who finalized adoptions on this special day!

None of the good things that happened in 2009 could have been possible without many partners and the dedicated hearts of many Iowa families. We are so thankful for you! Here's wishing you a Happy New Year's and a brilliant and beautiful start to 2010.

What are some of things you were thankful for in 2009? Leave a comment, and let us know!

A gift of love for children in foster care

2009-12-23T10:14:00.011-06:00

Here’s a great holiday story to warm you up during this winter weather! For the past several years, a group of women in Des Moines have been gathering together to make Christmas extra special for some of Iowa’s children who are waiting to be adopted from foster care. Women from the Circle of Support group of the Fifth District Department of Correctional Services and community volunteers create a handmade Christmas stocking stuffed with small gifts for the children.

The Circle of Support is a project that brings together former offenders, now on parole or probation, with volunteers from the community. It helps them reenter the community and offers support during the transition. The stocking project becomes a way for these women to give back to the community and helps them continue on their road to recovery.

The group finished this year’s stockings in early December. Each of the handmade stockings has the child’s name cross-stitched on it. For one woman who took part in last year’s project, the experience was particularly meaningful. “I was a foster child myself in 1993,” she said, “and I didn’t get to have something so precious and personal like these kids have gotten. I was proud to be part of this experience.”

What a great statement of love to these kids that the community cares about them, especially during this holiday season! If you want to meet some of the children in Iowa who are waiting to be adopted from foster care, you can see some of their bios, videos and photos on our web site.

Hope everyone stays safe during this next round of winter weather! Does your family have a favorite holiday tradition this time of year?

Parties that help kids!

2009-12-10T11:34:00.018-06:00

So by now, you may have attended a holiday party or two, or have one coming up as we close out the year! But have you ever attended a party that helps children in foster care?

One new and really exciting tool we have to help recruit foster parents and raise awareness about the needs of children in our communities is the Fosterware Party. If you've ever been to a Tupperware or purse party, the concept is fairly similar - it's just an informal, fun gathering. In this case though, your guests won't leave with a bowl or a bag, but with some new knowledge about foster care.

The host can be a foster parent or simply someone with a heart for kids (it's always good to have a current foster parent in attendance to answer questions though).

You help form the guest list, inviting friends, family, colleagues, neighbors or anyone you know who has an interest in supporting kids and families in your community. Iowa KidsNet provides all your materials. Some of my favorite things in the kit are the games - they educate you on foster care in a fun and creative way. There's one where you brainstorm advice for different situations that children in foster care may experience. You might be surprised to find that you have just what it takes to support these kids!

It's a fun way to share about the myths and facts around foster care, what the need is in your backyard and other info that will hopefully either inspire your guests to explore becoming a foster or adoptive parent or educate them so they can spread the word.

Want to throw a Fosterware Party in your neighborhood? Touch base with one of our Iowa KidsNet family recruiters, and they'll help you get started!

Hope everyone stayed safe during the blizzard yesterday! If you had a snow day at home, did you do anything fun?

Thankful

2009-11-24T15:18:00.016-06:00

As we approach this Thanksgiving holiday, I'm really thankful for Iowa's great foster and adoptive parents.

This past weekend was all about joy and thankfulness as we celebrated Adoption Saturday events in Ames, Cedar Rapids, Des Moines, Council Bluffs and Ottumwa. Click on the cities to read a few of the great stories that celebrated these kids and families last weekend.

We heard stories of a 16-year-old adopted who will now always have a place to call home. We heard stories of a sibling group of five children adopted who will now always get to stay together. We saw young children adopted who will now have a safe place to grow up and learn and laugh.

Amidst twinkle lights and violin music, cookies and courtrooms, heartbreaking poems and heartfelt speeches, we saw what beautiful things can happen when everyday people open their hearts and homes to a child. These kids and youth have some tough stories in their past, but with support from loving and caring adults they can write any story they want for their future.

Even if you can't commit to becoming a foster or adoptive parent, there are many things you can do all year long to help support children in foster care. Host a weekend at your faith community dedicated to raising awareness about the needs of children in your neighborhood. Volunteer at a local agency that supports youth in foster care. Host the Heart Gallery of Iowa, a photo exhibit of waiting children, at your local library or city hall. We can all do something to help make a difference!

So, to all the individuals across the state who worked so hard to make Adoption Saturday events a special day, and to all the children and parents who became part of new forever families - thank you!

Happy Thanksgiving!

A coffee break with Kris

2009-11-17T14:56:00.007-06:00

For today's coffee break, I'm excited to chat with Kris, a foster and adoptive mother from the Sioux City Service Area. Our coffee break is a regular feature when we talk with different folks from around the state involved in foster care and adoption. Kris's family took part in Sioux City's first ever Adoption Saturday last weekend and adopted a sibling group of two young boys!

First, congrats on being part of Adoption Saturday! How would you sum up the atmosphere at the courthouse?
It was great! Festive, and there were lots of really good speakers during the program. I really enjoyed how one adoptee talked about how when she went to her adoptive home, her mother made sure she stayed connected with her Native American heritage and culture.

The best part of the day?
That would be our actual adoption. And I have to add, our adoption worker is amazing!

You've been doing foster care for years. Any favorite stories?
I think our best moment in foster care was when a baby came to us from a hospital. We had him for seven months, and during that time his mother was incarcerated. When she came to pick him up at their reunification, he had never seen her but he just laid his head on her shoulder like he had known her forever. It was so great to see, and great to see someone who had turned her life around.

I love that story! Any words of advice for future foster and adoptive parents?
Take advantage of classes and training.

Thanks Kris for sharing a bit about this special day! And a big thanks to all the individuals in Sioux City who worked so hard to bring Adoption Saturday to northwest Iowa. This weekend Iowa has four other Adoption Saturday events coming up in Ames, Cedar Rapids (held on Friday, Nov. 20), Council Bluffs, and Des Moines.

Thanks for reading!

You don't have to be perfect

2009-11-06T15:34:00.004-06:00

Let's end this Friday with a laugh! If you haven't already seen some of these videos from the national campaign "You don't have to be perfect to be the perfect parent," they're definitely worth taking a minute to watch. Here's a few with more available at their web site.

I love this campaign, which points out that kids in foster care don't need perfection - they just need you! You can also visit their web site to send an e-card to a friend or parent for National Adoption Month.

Celebrating the joy of adoption

2009-10-30T15:54:00.007-05:00

All over the state we’re gearing up for National Adoption Month and Adoption Saturday events. This week I had the opportunity to attend a local proclamation signing at a city hall, declaring November 21 as National Adoption Day.

It’s exciting to see local communities, along with foster and adoptive families and child welfare agencies, embrace the spirit of National Adoption Month.

On this same night a local domestic violence and assault shelter had set up long rows of white chairs outside the city hall. Each one represented a person lost to domestic violence in our state within the last several years. Each one had a story taped to it about a person who should still be here, who should not be forgotten.

It was a powerful message. The thing that sticks with me the most, however, is not the chairs, not the stories. It’s the voice I heard down the street of a parent talking to someone with the shelter.

I heard his voice in the quiet night tell her that each one of his foster and adopted children had lost someone to domestic violence.

There are a lot of tough stories in the child welfare field. But National Adoption Month is truly a time for joy. We get to celebrate how, despite very painful circumstances, despite difficult beginnings, adoption can be part of changing lives.

We see courtrooms transformed by balloons and stuffed animals. We see the first photo taken of a new forever family. We see sibling groups who now know they get to stay together always, and teens who now know they will have a family to help guide them into adulthood.

As we kick off a month of celebration, thanks to all our families, caseworkers, advocates, volunteers and staff members who have helped touch the life of a child through adoption.

Myths of foster care adoption

2009-10-20T08:43:00.010-05:00

November's National Adoption Month is right around the corner! It's a time to raise awareness about the 129,000 children in our country who are waiting to be adopted. Some of them wait as long as five years to find their forever family, which can feel like a lifetime to a child.

So, what can you do to help as we gear up for Adoption Month? One of the first things you can do is learn the facts, like some of the myths of foster care adoption. According to the 2007 National Foster Care Adoption Attitudes Survey commissioned by the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, many of us have misperceptions about adoption from foster care:

45% of Americans think children in foster care enter the system because of juvenile delinquency.
Reality: Children enter the system after experiencing neglect, abandonment or abuse.

46% of Americans think foster care adoption is expensive.
Reality: Foster care adoption is not expensive, and financial support is available.

67% of Americans considering adoption think the biological parents could take the child back.
Reality: Once a child is legally available for adoption, the birth parents no longer have parental rights to the child.

As much as National Adoption Month is a time to raise awareness, it's also a time to simply celebrate the joy that adoption brings. One day that is definitely all about the joy is Adoption Saturday, a national day when courts open their doors to finalize thousands of adoptions for children in foster care. Iowa will host five Adoption Saturday events this year in Ames, Cedar Rapids, Council Bluffs, Des Moines and Sioux City (for the first time!). Check out this great video from National Adoption Day showing what this "one day" is truly all about.

How do you plan to celebrate Adoption Month? Leave a comment and let us know!

10 Reasons to Foster Teens

2009-10-08T10:13:00.009-05:00

I got a “save the date” email recently about Elevate’s upcoming conference in February (Feb. 13 at ISU!).

If you haven’t heard about Elevate, it’s an amazing program driven by Iowa youth who have been involved in foster care, adoption or other out-of-home placements. They share their powerful stories to educate people, to advocate for legislative changes, and to raise awareness about the need for homes for teens in foster care.

If you have a moment, please read some of their poems and their stories. I guarantee you will be inspired! (You may want to grab a box of tissues first.)

Our state should be so proud of these creative young leaders. It can be challenging to find homes for teens, but by having the courage to raise their voices, these youth are shaping better futures for all Iowa teens who may someday need a foster home. Just recently I heard about a new foster family who planned on fostering younger children - until a presentation by Elevate youth tugged at their hearts and made them decide to open their home to teens too.

I don't think we could give you any better reasons to foster teens than what you'll hear when reading their own words. But, in case you need a few more here's a light-hearted list from Iowa KidsNet staff.

Ten Reasons to Foster Teens

1. No diapers to change.

2. They sleep through the night.

3. They will move out sooner. . . but can still visit!

4. You don't just get to foster a child - you get a friend.

5. They'll keep you up to date on the latest fashion trends.

6. No more carpools - they can drive you places!

7. No bottles, formula, or burp rags required.

8. They can help around the house.

9. They can learn from you, and you'll learn from them.

10. They'll teach you how to text message and even use Facebook.

How has a teen touched your life? Leave a little comment and let us know!

You are the champions....

2009-10-01T13:53:00.015-05:00

As you might know, this summer Iowa KidsNet named eight “Adoption Champions” across the state to help us get the word out about our free post-adoption support services.

These families can relate to the challenges adoptive parents face because they've been in those shoes - each one is an adoptive family. In short, they’ll be helping plan support networks in their area and spreading the word about the adoption support services available to families.

With their help, some amazing things are already happening! For example, in August, the Ames service area held a weekend retreat for families with DHS subsidized adoptions. We had a great turnout – over 100 adults and kids from central Iowa.

Adoptive parents got to meet and discuss some of the common struggles they share and learn new tips through training. For the kids, we had a character counts program with Silly Sally, a challenge course and a special program by Elevate. Lots of new friendships were made!

Our goal with post-adoption support is to help you keep your family safe and stable. If you have a DHS subsidized adoption, you're eligible for free support services. A support specialist will work with your family to develop a support plan just for you, and he or she will be available to help you with any needs. That could mean anything from being a listening ear for you, or assisting during a crisis. If you want to find out more, call 1.800.243.0756.

Enjoy this rainy day, and thanks for caring!

A coffee break with Kelly

2009-09-24T10:51:00.010-05:00

Today I'm excited to present our first in a regular "coffee break" feature we'll be having from time to time where we chat with different folks involved in foster care and adoption in Iowa.

To kick it off, today we have a coffee break with Kelly Scheidler. Kelly is a foster and adoptive parent in the lovely southeast part of Iowa and has graciously agreed to be my guinea pig. Thanks Kelly! :)

To start, tell us a little bit about your family.
We have eight kids right now, ages 10 months to 17. Two are biological, three are adopted and three are in foster care.

What's the most bizarre question you've ever gotten about foster care?
To me, the most bizzare question is "Why would you want to take in someone else's problem children?" I think that's insane when people ask that because children are in foster care not because they have done something wrong, but because of their parents' decisions.

Any favorite foster care stories?
It's really great to be thanked by a birth family for helping take care of their kids or helping them get them back. We never planned on adopting - we were just going to do foster care - but we actually had a birth mother come to us and ask us if we would reconsider that. She was willing to voluntarily relinquish her rights if we would adopt her kids. And it's a good feeling to be thanked by the teenagers we've helped. We have teens who have left our home, but still contact us to let us know how they're doing and thank us.

Do you have a foster parent superpower?
The ability to organize 10 people's schedules. I've never missed an appointment.

Seriously, never? That's impressive.
No. I have everything logged into one place. I had a paper planner once that we lost for three days, and now so I don't have a heart attack I keep everything in a Wal-Mart palm pilot and back it up faithfully.

That's a good tip. Got any other words of wisdom for those just starting foster care or thinking about it?
Expect the unexpected. Be ready to take it day by day because you don't know what's going to be thrown at you. Go with the flow.

If you liked this "coffee break," leave a little comment and let us know!

Two big updates and a tip

2009-09-17T14:34:00.008-05:00

Hi! In the last couple of weeks we’ve added some important updates to our web site – this info is especially important if you’re a current foster or adoptive family.

What you need to know –

1. New DHS rules. As you might already know, the Iowa Department of Human Services (DHS) has adopted new rule changes that will affect current foster and adoptive families. These changes will go into effect on October 1, 2009. These changes include new rules for licensing, safety and training requirements.

It’s important you take some time to read through the changes here.

It’s a lot of information to digest, so I would encourage you to have a conversation with your Iowa KidsNet support specialist or IFAPA peer liaison even if you don't have questions. He or she can walk through the changes with you and talk about which ones might affect your family and how you can prepare for or address those. These rules are also sometimes up to interpretation, so it would be beneficial to talk through the changes with someone that is familiar with them.

Foster parents, we know how much time you invest not only in the kids, but also in continuing to meet necessary state requirements like these. We try to say it a lot, but we can never say it enough – please know how much we appreciate your dedication to fostering and to the kids!

2. Court hearings for youth in foster care. This is really good news! DHS has been pilot testing a new automated process for notifying foster parents about court hearings for the youth in their care. Right now it’s being tested in two counties, and if all goes according to plan, it could be in place statewide by November. Read more here.

3. Tips on support roles. Iowa has a lot of support in place for its families. While that’s a wonderful thing, we know it can also be confusing sometimes to know who does what. DHS and a group of service providers created a tip chart that will hopefully give you a better idea of all the support available and how each person or agency can help you. Check it out here.

Whew! Lots of info. Thanks for taking the time to check it out, and again, please don't hesitate to talk to your support specialist with any questions.

Enjoy the rest of the week!

Potential for greatness

2009-09-10T13:13:00.029-05:00

Hi, and welcome!

When we were thinking about what to name our new Iowa KidsNet blog, one of the names that came to mind was potential for greatness. Maybe you've seen this phrase on our posters or web site - it's been one of our slogans for recruiting Iowa foster and adoptive parents.

The foster care system is complex, but at the heart of it all it's about one thing - looking out for the best interests of kids. We believe that with the right kind of love and support (from people like you!) that kids can reach their potential for greatness, even if they've had a really tough start in life. So, hopefully the name of this blog reflects that - the potential that Iowa's children have, and the potential we all have to do something that makes a difference for children in foster care.

We'll be sharing news, resources, stories, etc, about once a week. If you were a reader of our post-adoption support blog, thank you! And if you missed it, you can still go back and check it out here. There's some great resources and articles from our support specialists, and we'll continue sharing those kinds of tips here in the future.

And to close, I'll introduce myself. My name is Stacey, and I'll be your sort-of-host in this space. I've been with Iowa KidsNet since 2007. One of my favorite parts of working in this field is constantly being inspired - we have some amazing foster parents with some very, very big hearts. :)

Thanks for reading and for your heart for Iowa kids!